Here are 5 Reasons Why You Need to Have a Strong Internal Locus of Control

Internal locus of control (ILOC) is a concept in psychology that is related to the principle of determining the success and failure of an individual. This concept is rooted in Rotter’s social-learning theory of personality which has been developed since 1954.

This concept focuses on the ability of a person to associate his achievements or failures with his own capacity. In other words, this concept is a belief system which stated that each has an awareness of his strengths and weaknesses.

Internal locus of control is often regarded as a permanent mindset derived from one’s genes. However, several recent studies have revealed that this concept can also come from the influence of the family attitude, the environment around the house, and the daily interactions.

Having a strong internal locus of control personality can be very beneficial for your character development. Here are 5 reasons why

1. It Makes You Aware of Your Own Weaknesses

Realizing your own weaknesses is an important key to achieving success in the future. Many people are not aware of their own mistakes and weaknesses, so sometimes they spend much time to figure it out.

By having a strong ILOC, you can easily detect your own shortcomings. This attitude will make it easier for you to do a self-evaluation and find the best path to improve yourself.

People with ILOC characters will understand that internal factors are what determine someone’s success or failure. Thus, you will not be busy looking for reasons or blaming others for your failure.

2. It Would Be Much Easier for You to Take Control of Your Life

Having ILOC personality will help you to take control of your own life. It should be noted that one of the most common complaints of psychological problems today is the difficulty to feel “control” in life. Many factors make people believe that they do not have control over their own lives, starting from dissatisfaction with financial conditions, loneliness, or traumatic experiences in the past.

Also, many experts believe that the phenomenon happens because many people find it difficult to conduct self-introspection subjectively and tend to blame external factors as the main reasons to lose control over their lives.

However, regardless of the ILOC context, you have to stop looking for excuses and start taking control of your life right now. After all, the feeling of having control over your own life will make you happier and more relaxed in no time.

3. You Would Focus on Developing Yourself Rather than Thinking about Other Things that are Beyond Your Control

Having an awareness that your own ability determines the outcome will keep you busy focusing on developing yourself. This will indirectly make you forget other things that are beyond your control.

Thinking about things that are beyond your control is a waste of time and should not be done. You cannot manage things that are beyond your reach, such as opinions, attitudes, or feelings of others. Therefore, focus on developing things that you can control can be a big advantage for your self-development.

4. Cultivating Leadership Characteristics within Your Soul

The characteristics of the ILOC concept are believed to be able to produce quality leaders. The main reason is that people with strong ILOC are usually more confident and not easily influenced by negative opinions from others. Moreover, they also have such high self-confidence and ability to evaluate a problem from an objective perspective.

However, it should be underlined that leadership quality is not only measured by how strong someone’s ILOC is. Other characteristics can affect final output such as honesty, ethical behavior, empathy, and integrity.

5. Better Decision-Making Skills

Many studies reveal that people with strong ILOC tend to be more competent in making difficult decisions. Some scientists presume that the reason is that they are more objective and do not hesitate to trust their own ideas and consideration.

In making personal decisions in life, you often think of the impact of that decision on others even though you are the one who will feel the impact directly. This attitude will make it difficult for you to make choices in life.

Finally, the research on the development of internal locus of control of an individual is still being developed until now. If you want to shape yourself into a more positive person using this concept, try to consult with a therapist to find the right method to develop this personality in you.

However, as mentioned above, internal locus of control also has a different “genetic tendency” in each person. Therefore, there is no need to force yourself to develop such character if you feel that this concept does not match your inner character. After all, trying to be the best version of yourself is more than enough.

7 Signs of High Emotional Intelligence in Daily Life

How do you tell if someone has a high level of emotional intelligence? Do you have it in everyday life? While being “happy”, “motivated”, or “optimistic” is often viewed as a sign of a healthy individual, they are not included in the signs of emotional intelligence. The common signs are related to how you manage your and other people’s emotions, putting them into account in your behaviors.

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

An emotionally intelligent person understands how his or her acts affect emotions, both for themselves and others. Despite different opinions in describing this kind of intelligence, psychologists and researchers generally agree that it covers at least three things:

  • Ability to recognize emotions, even the most complex ones (emotional awareness)
  • Ability to use the emotion in a proper way to conduct critical thinking and problem solving
  • Ability to manage emotions, such as by expressing them the right way or saying the right words to people with different characteristics

Emotional intelligence (EI) does not have a formal measurement tool. However, you can rely on several prominent signs to detect it.

Common Emotional Intelligence Signs

Here are seven common signs you may notice from someone (or yourself) that has high emotional intelligence:

  1. Able to describe complicated emotions

People with high EI can discern layers of emotions, and relate them to their own experiences, decision making process, and motivations. For example, they understand the true emotions behind the superficial expression, and how those emotions affect certain behaviors or decision making.

  1. Take time to reflect

Reflecting and pondering are more difficult to do nowadays, due to numerous distractions and fast-paced lifestyle. The ability to reflect and think deeply helps in factoring all aspects before making a decision. It also helps to keep perspective in check, even when facing a crisis.

  1. Show strong empathy

Empathy is one of the strongest characteristics of EI. Showing empathy means able to understand people’s view and thoughts from their perspectives. It does not mean that you always agree with them. Empathy helps you to see the bigger picture and look at a problem from different perspectives.

  1. Able to construct positive feedbacks

Positive feedbacks are harder to make than cynical criticism because they require deep thoughts and low ego. Positive feedbacks can help the recipients to fix their mistakes, without making them feel self-conscious or humiliated.

  1. Able to set boundaries

People who always say “yes” often view themselves as helpful, but this is the sign of inability to set boundaries. The ability to set boundaries shows that you are strong, assertive, but not secluded. This means that you understand your limit, demand respect, and refuse to fulfill other people’s requests while sacrificing your well-being.

  1. Don’t dwell in self-rumination

Self-rumination is a fancy name for “unable to move on”. A person with high EI is able to solve the negativity that arises from one bad incident and prevent it from ruining his/her day. While tackling negative emotions is important, you must know when to let negativity pass when necessary.

  1. Be honest about emotions and feelings

“Emotionally honest” does not mean being a drama queen or screaming jerk. It means you can communicate what you feel honestly when trying to solve a problem with someone else. People with high EI usually do not use tricks like silent treatment, passive-aggressive attitude, or emotional blackmail.

These are not the only signs of high emotional intelligence. However, having these traits may reflect a healthier psychological aspect in a person.

Tips to Develop Emotional Intelligence

You can learn to develop EI and be a better person at a psychological level. Here are some tricks to try every day:

  • Learn to harness emotion and think deeply

It is easy to explode with anger when something bothers you. When something that angers you happen, such as an argument with your coworker or spouse, don’t lash out immediately. Give yourself time for several minutes to ponder the situation from various perspectives.

  • Practice speaking with a proper vocabulary

Words reflect your emotional skill, and the ability to explain yourself properly will nurture emotional intelligence. Practice by imagining several scenarios when you have to face something bad at home or work. Imagine the best course of action to take and the words you can use to describe your thoughts. Deliver them out loud to make the situation more real.

  • Track down your stressors

Knowing things that stress you out the most will help in harnessing your emotion. Keep a journal to record what happens during the day. Remember the times when you feel anxious or angry, and describe them in the journal. Review the content after a week. By understanding your main stressors, you can take steps to manage them.

You can also review the times when you feel overwhelmed from doing everyone’s work. Review your limits and learn to say no. Start from something small, and experience the ease when you are able to find more time for yourself.

Emotional intelligence is important to develop a healthy mind and good communication skill. By developing this skill, you can grow your potentials and achieve more appreciation in your daily life.