Parable: Of Heaven and Hell
Leaving the hut he recalled the parable that taught the difference between heaven and hell. The nature of heaven and hell was something he thought about from time to time, especially whenever he had fallen ill or just happened to be in a bad temper. His privacy disturbed, he was at this moment quite irritable. Hence he recalled the fable. Unfortunately Catr could not remember the source, although there was a good chance he read it in a book rather than heard it in a conversation. Catr was never much for conversation. Of course what else would you expect from a person who lives in a coral hut beneath the sea? What would you expect from a person that stops to rest in a coral hut as he walks beneath the sea?
The fable might have originated in Latin America. It might have originated in Africa. The only thing certain about its origin however was that it needed to be a culture that used spoons. Spoons, you see, are an important element the story. To begin:
A man is dying and prays for a vision of heaven and hell, so that he would know what was in store for him. St. Peter (a suitable proxy for a spirit from the other world. You can substitute whomsoever or whatsoever you like for St. Peter, but you get the idea) comes to him, and takes him first to hell. Hell is a big round table, with a delicious stew set in a pot in the center. The stew smells terrific. It is loaded with the finest foods, prepared using the collective wisdom of all who have cooked since the dawn of man. Everyone at the table has a spoon, but these spoons are very strange. They have exceptionally long handles. The handles extend to reach the pot and then some. As a result, the people in hell are starving. Every time they scoop the soup, it spills before they manage to get it into their mouths. The people in hell are as a result not only starving, but quite a mess. The man who is dying can think of no worse torture than an eternity of unobtainable food and begs St. Peter (or your proxy spirit) to take him away at once.
St. Peter obliges, and takes him to have a look at heaven. Heaven is also a big round table, with a delicious stew set in the pot in the center. This stew also smells terrific. It too is loaded with the finest foods, prepared using the collective wisdom of all who have cooked since the dawn of man. In fact, as St. Peter informs the dying man, the stew is prepared in the exact same kitchen as that of the stew in hell. Everyone at the table has a spoon, but these spoons are also very strange. They also have exceptionally long handles. The handles extend to reach the pot and then some. In other words, they are the same as the spoons in hell. However, in heaven, none of the people are starving. They are all quite well fed, and chatter amicably amongst themselves. They are also neat and clean.
St. Peter looks at the dying man and asks him where he thinks he belongs. Catr considers the story as he leaves the coral hut behind.
| Comments (1)Being God
One of the advantages of being God is that you can see into the mind of any living thing. In theory, at least. The problem the tall man encountered was that while he could predict the behavior of animals, it seemed, perfectly, he was particularly inept at reading the thoughts of people. What was especially problematic to him, however, was that the most difficult person of all for him to read was his wife. In fact, his inability to read his wife had increased 1000 fold since he came to the realization that he was God. Yes, this is counter-intuitive. Her mind should be an open book, now. But when he became God, his ability to read her vanished.
Why?
He considered several possibilities. Each however was easily rebutted with a simple question and answer: But why? You are God. The classic excuse being that God has all existence on his mind, and so doesn't focus on the details. But if God is infinite and all knowing, how can this be so etc etc. You get the picture.
The more problematic but plausible explanation the tall man settled on was tied into his ability to predict animal behavior. It was the fact that animals hadn't been given free will and he, God, had bestowed this gift on mankind. Man had a special place. It was mankind's special place and free will that increased responsibility and resulted in God's distancing himself from everyday lives. Instead, would catch up with people on judgment day and settle accounts. This self imposed limitation of God's extended, of course, to his own wife.
If this explanation was true, the tall man was in big trouble. It meant that by asserting his rights and responsibilities as God, he was relinquishing his rights and responsibilities as a human and husband. Meaning that he would no longer be able to communicate with his wife, that he would no longer be able to intuit what she wanted. And so if he thought there were problems with his relationship before he realized he was God - when he had the same limitations as other men with respect to their wives - he knew that now it was going to get a lot worse. At least in the old days sometimes he would get it right.